Confused since eternity
I’ll look for you
In the darkest of hours
You may not know
But you were being watched
Or cared as I’d say
Rather than telling you the truth
I’ll make you believe
That I’m the truth
That I was your thought
I’ll betray you
In the brightest of seconds
And will leave you wounded
Wounds you’ll probably never heal from
Will give you a scar
You’ll be ashamed of
Even in the darkest of hours
Because I’ve loved you
But never really let you love me.
बहुत दूर, अपनी नई सी दुनिया में
खो रही थी तुम
बातें भी बताना बंद कर दी तुमने
शायद, अब अकेले रो रही थी तुम
मैं, रंगीनियों में तुमसे छिप रहा था
और अपने अंदर, एक ग़ैर बो रही थी तुम
तुम्हारे पास, फिर भी दूर था बहुत तुमसे
मुझे पता है, उस दिन फ़ोन पर अकेली सो रही थी तुम
मैंने खुद तुम्हें ख़ुद से दूर कर दिया
जब हमारे सपने आंखों में संजो रही थी तुम
अंदाज़ा दूरी का भी मुझे तब हुआ
जब अपनी यादों को मेरी आंखों में भिगो रही थी तुम
अब रेलगाड़ी तुमसे दूर ले जा रही है मुझे
मेरे शहर की ओर
और पिछली स्टेशन पर चैन की नींद सो रही हो तुम
पत्थर होना
होता है सुरक्षित होना
मगर उतना ही सुरक्षित
जितना सुरक्षित होता है खंजर का कोना
लहू बहेगा यह निश्चित है
घायल होगा हाथ तुम्हारा
या फ़िर होगा मेरा सीना
पत्थर के भीतर का मवाद
जब जब फूट बाहर बिखरेगा
सुरक्षित होना पता नहीं पर
अपनों से दूर पड़ेगा होना
फ़िर क्यों आवश्यक है पत्थर होना
ख़ुद में अकड़ना, टुकड़ा होना?
क्यों न पत्थर पिघलाई जाए
खंजर एक बनाई जाए
नोक भी होगा, बट भी होगी
मगर सुरक्षित होगा हाथ में संभाल का होना
रात को मौत हो या मौत की वो रात हो,
ज़िन्दगी की शाम तक बस ख़ामोशी का साथ हो।
कोई कुछ कहे नहीं, ना कोई मेरी कुछ सुने,
सन्नाटा हो मौत तक, न ख़ाब कोई गढ़े बुने।
लोगों को ख़बर न हो, न बात फैले दूर तक,
ये मौत मेरी अपनी हो, कोई इल्ज़ाम हो न किसी पे शक।
कब्र मेरी हो न हो पर ज़िन्दगी हो लाश में,
आस पूरी हो न हो, हो कश ही आखिरी सांस में।
प्रेरणा मिले नहीं पर कविता हो उस कागज़ पर,
ज़िन्दगी ना सही, मौत हो पर सागर भर।
दिखें जवाब मेरे प्रश्नों के, मेरे टूटे-फूटे चश्मों से,
ना रिश्ता हो मज़हब ना वास्ता हो रस्मों से।
श्राद्ध मेरा हो अगर, जल जाऊं सारे कसमों से,
श्रृंगार मेरी प्रेरणा का हो मेरे ही भस्मों से।
रूह गर जो बच गई, कविता सुनोगे मेरी तुम,
सवाल मेरी कविता में फ़िर करेंगे तुमको गुम।
जवाब मेरी मौत का दे ना सकोगे ध्यान रहे,
मैं ख़ाक़ हो जाऊं फ़िर भी अमर तुम्हारा अभिमान रहे।
I was looking at the sky and she came and touched my nose. I was looking for it in the skies and wanted her to come harder. She started gently by kissing my nose, then she became a tear in my left eye. I could see her rolling down my cheek. I wanted her to roll but not to let her go. She slipped away, smoothly. I saw her slipping down my neck, she was so intimate that I couldn’t even breathe without letting her know. She went down and made me shiver. Then she took hold of my hair, grabbed it properly and started kissing my forehead. She touched my lips and stayed there for a while. I greedily wanted her to stay a little more, but she went down the neck. I looked at the sky again, seeking more lust. She became aggressive, started wetting my clothes by showering on me. The structure of chest started becoming visible through the white shirt I was wearing. She could see my soul through that white shirt. She hugged me harder.
Every passing second she was getting closer and making me vulnerable. She was making me show every flaw, every impotence and every foible of mine. The more I was closer, the more transparent I was. I couldn’t even lit my cigarette so that I could hide my wrinkles behind the smoke. Yes, smoke was the armour to my incompetency. Instead of shielding, I don’t know why but I allowed her to tear me apart. She went through me. She showered on me once again and washed all my protectiveness and fakeness. She did that for a while,calmly, gently. All I could hear was the sound of droplets striking the soul. That was the last soothing sound I heard, before leaving this cosmos.
ये अँधेरा शांत है बहुत
चीखता है मगर कानों में मेरे
एक रोती बेवा की तरह
रोता है आँखों में मेरे
बदन तप रहा है और आत्मा जल रही है मेरी
बगैर माचिस के
हर रोज़
एक ही वक़्त
इसी अँधेरे में
इस अँधेरे की चीखों में
दब जाती है उन रोते हुए कुत्तों की आवाज़ें
रातें डरावनी करना फ़ितरत है जिनकी
और मेरी भी
सीने की आग ठंडी कर देने वाला ये अँधेरा
डराता है बहुत
चुप चाप कानों में आकर
रोएं खड़ी कर देता है
और सोख लेता है आँखों के आंसू
मजबूर कर देता है लाल आँखें ले घूमने पर
और बना देता है मुझे भी
डर का सौदागर
कर देता है लोगों को दूर
और धकेल देता है फिर उस सन्नाटे में
जिसकी चीखों से दर लगता है मुझे
I opened the gate, the sound of fan was filling the room. Looking at me, awestruck, both of them were panting heavily. There was fear in their eyes, an unknowing fear, something like when you know you’ve entered the wrong path in the middle of the night and there’s no going back. They were sweating like hell and still the reason wasn’t clear if it was me or not. The sheets were ruined and there were clothes all over the place. It was a complete mess, if I may recall. Windows were closed and curtains were drawn, properly. There was no room for the light to come inside. A low power neon bulb was all that was glowing. I saw her face, it was pale because of fear. I couldn’t fathom whether she was under dressed or completely naked. A sheet was all she wore. There was a diary thrown at the floor. I picked it up and started flipping pages and that’s when that girl ran at me, naked. She snatched the diary from me and immediately went back and wrapped her sheet. This time I clearly saw her face, she wasn’t her. Yes she still hadn’t let me read her diary but she wasn’t her. There was a sense of arrogance on her face, not her usual innocence. I saw him, almost my age and still panting.
I was about to tighten my fist when she said to him he looks drunk maybe he accidentally entered the room you should’ve locked the gates properly. I came back to the lobby realising, she wasn’t her.
I sat down and heard my reminder alarm, it showed 22nd march, death anniversary, Sunaina. No she wasn’t her. I sighed.
गजल ही तो हो तुम
What would be the perfect place for you to hangout- an eatery, a tranquil location, a religious and holy environment or a spot where you can find the younger lot? Well, Gandhi Ghat has it all for you!
If you think that Ghat is just another set of stairs erected along the river bank, you might be wrong.Gandhi Ghat- ghat with calmness, spirituality, placidness and enjoyment that surpasses the stress we hold within; Ask the locals and the visitors, everyone will tell you their own story. While some visit the Ghat to inhale the poise of Ganga, others come for sheer fun. For some ,it’s a place to chill and have fun, for others it is home. A place where they can breathe few moments free from their daily feverishness, a place where they can cry their depression out in solitude, or a place where they can live the best of the moments.
Due to its location behind the National Institute of Technology, it is also known as NIT Ghat. Whatever your mood is, Ghat always has something for you,like boating, eateries, or just sitting beside your someone special, immersed in endless talks.
The shops across the river at Diara island also gives you the facility of preparing food for your chicken party. You can provide them with the chicken and they will cook for you and your friends. Isn’t that amazing?
You can easily consider Ghat as a plot of narrative with different characters in it- chaiwalas, smokers, priests, young couples, women and men who come to wash their sins off, photographers(both professional and self proclaimed ), artists seeking their inspiration, and what not! Everyone seems to be busy in their own monologue.
As the sun travels West the comeliness of the Ghat increases; It comes to climax during sunset. The breathtaking sunset one feels at the Ghat is one of the indelible sunsets you can ever have.
As the darkness prevails the sky, lamps offered in Ganga Aarti enlighten the Ghat.
Ganga Aarti- the holy ceremony of worshipping mother Ganga is another virtue of this Ghat. A group of priests dressed in saffron robes ,offer a total of 51 lamps to the holy river. Aarti starts with the blowing Shankhs, purifying the ambience and continues with movements of lamps, making a pattern of OM. This ritual started in 2011 on the lines of Banaras and Haridwar.
As we are approaching Makar Sankranti ,you just can not stop buzzing about the famous Kite festival. Bihar tourism department organises Kite festival on the Diara island, on the occasion of Makar Sankranti every year.
As you can see the ongoing construction of Patna Marine Drive ,you can easily interpret that the allurement of Gandhi Ghat is only gonna improve with time. Whether it is newly built Digha Sonpur bridge on the left, or 35 years old Mahatma Gandhi Setu on the right, it only adds to the serene view from the Ghat and its pleasingness. This Marine Drive or Ganga Driveway will add to the charm of Gandhi Ghat and we only hope to see the Gandhi Ghat welcoming people with the same warmth even after 50 more years. This, mini Banaras, is a place to be, for every Patnaite.
Wierd Philosopher 